I feel like there's something important I might be missing here. Something that's just coming up on the social calendar...maybe in less than a week? Oh well. I'm sure it will come to me.
One such important event in a ladies calendar is a time-honoured, yet sadly long-lost, tradition: the afternoon tea. It just oozes elegance and civility, doesn't it? Back in the days wear the ladies wore gloves and the men fedoras, the afternoon tea would be the equivalent of today's invitation to the Mean Girls table in school. It's something you always hoped for and yet dreaded all at the same time. What should I talk about? Or what shouldn't I? Do I wait to be asked to take a seat, or just sit down wherever? And perhaps, most important of all, what should I wear?
Fear not. Should such an important invitation find its way to your inbox, I've prepared a handy reference guide to help you through the darkest moments in your closet.
1. The Tea Dress: Traditionally the tea party was considered a social event which occurred between lunch and dinner, where the table would be dressed its best. So, to, should its guests. Trousers would only be considered appropriate if you happen to have a penis. The dress should neither be too long nor too short, so right around the knee would likely be best. The neckline shouldn't be too revealing, nor should the shoulders be too bare. If the dress you choose happens to be strapless, it would be the perfect time to break out a cropped cardigan or wrap to go with it. Consider one of these dresses - or, really, anything from Anthropologie - when making your dressing choice, and you couldn't go far wrong.
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| Rebecca Williams dress, as seen in Fluid magazine |
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| Rosehill Lane Dress, Pinup Couture |
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| Tea at Dusk dress, from ModCloth.com |
2. Accessories: While gloves and hats are not entirely necessary these days, what better opportunity are you going to find to wear them than to an afternoon tea? And, let's be honest, is there ever any place where a fascinator would not be considered completely acceptable? Here is a selection you might find inspiring.
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Anthropologie Cloche |
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| Classic White gloves, frockery.co.uk |
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| Fascinator headband, ModCloth.com |
3. Shoes: The most important finishing touch to any outfit, the afternoon tea shoe is much like the dress itself: neither too bold nor too boring. Kitten heels, a low wedge, perhaps even a dressy Oxford would do well in this environment.
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| Lanvin kitten heel, via madaboutshoes.org |
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| Candy-coated Oxford, also ModCloth.com |
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| Harajuku Lovers wedge, from ModCloth.com |
So there you have it - a complete wardrobe for tea, sorted. Now if only you had somewhere to actually wear it.
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