And Now For Something Completely Different...

Now this post doesn’t really have anything to do with makeup at all – though I have a feeling it might tie in in the end since the Academy Award nominees were announced earlier this week and the fact that a certain movie failed to get a nod for Best Achievement in Makeup left me seriously pissed. 

Before you think I’ve lost it completely, I’m talking about the film Black Swan.

Out of everyone I've spoken to about it, this film was very much either a love or hate situation. Like opera. Yes, it was completely over-the-top and theatrical; yes, it was at times completely ridiculous. However it was in those same moments, for me at least, that it was also at its best. It lifts you outside of yourself and drops you into its world for an hour and a half, and elevated the ridiculous to the point of sublime. But then again, I love opera so perhaps that could be why I felt that way.

My point is coming, I swear. I’m not just type-babbling here.

I’m not a huge fan of the ballet. I tried to watch The Nutcracker one Christmas Eve and fell asleep about twenty minutes in. But by the end of Black Swan, I discovered that not only had I developed a hither-to unknown appreciation for the art form, but also a deep and all-consuming desire to see Swan Lake. Oh, and a sudden urge to take ballet lessons. Does that make me some sort of masochist? Or is that how the film is supposed to make you feel? Or, and this is far more likely, am I just reading way too much into the way I felt after walking out of the theatre? 

Anyway, so home I came to do what I do best - look things up on the Internet. And in looking up various forms of ballet-style exercise I discovered that the woman who trained Natalie Portman for her role, ten year New York City Ballet veteran Mary Helen Bowers, has set up a unique yet brilliantly simple method of ballet training. You can take ballet classes with her online. Through Skype. Genius! If I wasn't horrifically uncoordinated and resembled more of a smoked pork product than a ballerina in a leotard, I would be seriously tempted to try it. But I will spare myself and everyone else. However, if you feel like giving it a whirl, or grand jete as the case may be, the link can be found here: www.balletbeautiful.com

Oh well - at least Black Swan was nominated for a BAFTA for Best Makeup and Hair. And since Alice in Wonderland - another movie in which the makeup was beyond fantastic - also failed to make the Oscar list in that category I am left highly suspicious of the whole affair. I mean, Barney's Version? The Way Back? This is what beats out Swan and Alice for Best Makeup?!? What the hell kind of world is it that we're living in where something like that happens?  

I'm thinking that maybe I'll just skip the Oscars altogether this year. A virtual boycott based on principle alone. Who knows? I might have better things to do that night. Like ballet class. 

Natalie Portman is The Black Swan